Self Regulation

"I'm OK mommy. I'm OK mommy. I'm OK mommy." Robbie is almost yelling from our living room. I am in the kitchen and I did not ask him if he was OK. It is a question that I ask often- usually with the scripted response "yes I'm OK."  Sometimes I will get "I'm not OK." But rarely is there any explanation of why he is not OK after. I know there is a problem because this circle of language continues. It's similar to those you see in a scary movie hugging their knees telling themselves it's going to be alright when we all know it is not. For Robbie- it's all part of his ability or many times inability to self regulate.  He has gotten much better at it.  Generally we  know what seasons, days, or issues are going to be a challenge. Right now for instance. We are in the middle of a brutal winter. Lots of snow- snow days. Too much screen time and not enough output of energy. It happens every year and we all feel it. To Robbie's credit he has developed some coping skills. The small indoor trampoline, laying under many blankets and pillows for quiet time, deep breathing techniques, and telling himself he is OK.
Saturday night Robbie had a tough night. He fell asleep around 9:30pm after his nightly ritual of clonidine and melatonin. At 1am he woke up. From 1 am on- he was awake. By 2:30am I had given up and told him to grab his Ipad in hopes I could get a little sleep myself. By the next day around 11am we heard him in the kitchen. He had gotten his clonidine out of the cabinet and was crushing a tablet to put in the juice cup he had retrieved. Rob asked him what he was doing and he explained he was tired and wanted to sleep. Rob moved the medication away explaining it was for night time use only and took Robbie upstairs in hopes of getting him settled so he could get some sleep.
The exchange floored us a bit. We thought we were being sneaky by slipping the medication into his juice at night. We've always called it night time juice but never imagined Robbie really understood what we were giving him. Another example of how bright this boy really is. Most times it is unclear if he is paying attention to anything going on around him, aside from his movies, Ipad and anything food related.
The hope is Robbie can get to a point where he can self regulate, especially at the appropriate times. Nighttime is a big one. Because we're all tired!