Expectations

This post is two fold- Do I need to adjust certain expectations for Robbie? Do Others need to adjust certain expectations for Robbie?
Others first- Yesterday I went to pick Robbie up from after school games club. This is a social skills club where regular education children and special needs children play board games. The goal is to teach good sportsmanship, turn taking, social interaction and acceptance of those with differences. Those are the goals in my mind. The club has only met a few times due to snow and holidays. The person leading the group is Robbie's school social worker. She hasn't had a ton of direct contact with Robbie but has managed his case for the 3 years he has been at his current school. The first week she told me how great he did- although she had to encourage him to pop the dice for the game of trouble. ( encourage meaning hold her hand over his.) He did try to introduce his sister to a little girl in the club when we picked him up. To me- that was great. Yesterday she was excited because "Robbie did such a great job! He popped the dice all on his own." Hmmm. Really? I can see the progression but we also have the same game at home and on occasion he will play with Lexi and I. When we got home I read his daily report from school. Robbie had been very moody, difficult and was giving his teacher the silent treatment. She asked if we had experienced the same thing. Another subject entirely- but yes we have experienced the same thing on and off for a few weeks. He has seemed very overwhelmed at times and will change his mind during the same sentence. " Can I have applesauce, no I don't want applesauce, yes I'll eat applesauce, no I'm not hungry, please give me applesauce."  Yes- that is for real. It happens many times during the day. Sometimes he just stops talking. He does this on purpose and will ensure he has full attention and eye contact while pointing out what he wants. Kind of brilliant if you ask me. He's struggling- so this makes it easier. - I digress. Expectations. Are the expectations Robbie's social worker has for games club that he will pop the dice in a game and that is success? I hope not. That is not my expectation. Next up- email to social worker discussing expectations and goals.
My expectations- I've mentioned in many blogs that Robbie doesn't understand catch phrases or slang terms. This morning I asked Robbie to get dressed and made a comment "whatever works man." His response was "I am not a man, I am a boy." My reply " Robbie you are right, you are a boy. It's just an expression. "   Robbie " I am not an expression!!!!! I am a boy. I am Robbie!!" I put my hand on his head to calm him down and said " you are sensitive today."  He replied- " I am not hot- I am better."  He thought I was checking his temperature.  I thought about the interaction that had just taken place. I asked Lexi if she understood what a catch phrase was. For example " see you later alligator." She said  "you mean from a movie?" I explained that I am not really calling her an alligator- which I think she understood but the concept of a catch phrase may be a bit over her head. So- when do children pick up catch phrases , satire, sarcasm and really understand what they mean? I think I have to adjust my expectations. Maybe one day Robbie will truly understand, and then again, maybe not. Either way , it's ok. :)