Gain and Loses

One of the frustrating realities of Autism is regression. Things will be going smoothly and than suddenly skills seem to be lost or situations you felt were controlled are again- out of control. Last weekend Robbie wanted to go to the lake. I told him we would have to go later because we were doing other things around the house at that time. Rob had also mentioned possibly going to our neighbors- 3 doors down at the end of our street. While the rest of our family and 2 members of our neighbors family were in our backyard, Robbie said" getting my coat." I didn't think much of it, as it was 70 degrees. A few minutes later the woman directly next door told us she had seen Robbie running down the street. Frantic, I jumped up thinking he must have gone to the lake. We screamed his name while running down the street. ( Robbie generally will not answer when his name is being called- but what else do you do?) The man at the next house said Robbie was seen going into the neighbors back yard. I found him walking into their back door. They are 3 houses down. Scary and depressing. It had been 2 years since Robbie had last escaped without us knowing. So- we go back to double locking all doors and I have spoken to our local borough office and local police. However, the opposite is also true. Things will be a bit bumpy and then- a huge burst of skills emerges. Last year at this time we were very frustrated and nervous about behavior and learning. This year- at the same time- things are improving. Robbie's speech and communication has dramaticly improved. It is not where it should be for a typical 7 year old- but the improvement is life changing. Robbie is able to tell us what he wants, needs, and feels. (most of the time ) While there are still times where Robbie is in his own world, he is "present" more of the time. Usually getting him off the bus means me saying " Hi Robbie, how was your day?" with no response from him, or the scripted answer "my day was good." While we are not getting him to tell us about the field trip he went on yesterday ( I had totally forgotten about) he is looking in my eye and saying "Hi Mommy." I can't express the joy I feel at such a small amount of self expression, acknowlegement, presence. It is , sorry to be repetitive, life changing. Not only for Robbie but for me as well. It gives me hope for his future. It also shows all the hard work Robbie is doing and we as a family continue to do is paying off. Small steps but hopefully BIG future!!