For Better or Worse.....................

After the game on Saturday a fellow coach and one of Rob's best friends asked " Is Robbie getting worse?" I had not thought of things as better or worse. Or in sickness and health and for richer or poorer. yet here we are. I will proudly admit I am a fan of "Bachelor Nation." For those unfamiliar this refers to shows like " The Bachelor" or " The Bachelorette." Tonight I was watching the valentines episode that had been DVR'd- because I can rarely watch nighttime television at its regular time. My daughter was watching with me after a rough evening with Robbie. We've just started a new medication and his behavior is still very sporadic. A lot of grabbing, screaming at the top of his lungs, requests for hugs, and demands for things exactly his way. " No mom, it does not go here, it goes HERE!!!" ( 2 inches to the left- for no apparent reason. ) "No mom, don't say it like that - say Robbie why are you mad?" - I had asked "what's wrong, are you ok?"........ As I mentioned before Lexi gets very nervous when this behavior emerges. She is worried that I might get hurt and inserts herself into the situation. Lexi is wonderful with Robbie and seems to have a calming effect on him but every time this occurs I ask her to remove herself from the situation. She is 7 years old. I do not want her to have the additional stress of protecting me added to her already stressful existence. I am her mom. I am the one who needs to protect her. This all brings me back to the bachelor special we watched together. It was a wedding episode. Lexi is a girly girl- and loves wedding shows etc. She had a lot of questions- all beautifully innocent. " Was your wedding like this? Are they getting baby gifts? Are they leaving to buy a house?" As they went they went through the vows- my eyes did tear a bit. " For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do you part." A beautiful memory of a perfect wedding day for Rob and I. One I almost wish Lexi could have enjoyed with us. As a family- it made me think of those vows. Those were not only vows I gave to my husband and vice versa, but vows we gave to our family- not yet created. For better or worse. Yes, this is worse, but it is a part of life. Adolescence/ puberty on top of Autism. We are doing everything we can so I know this too shall pass and it will get better..........:)