I've always felt.........lucky

I've always felt lucky. Wonderful family, great friends and a pretty nice life. Even through the world of Autism, I've felt lucky. I'd hear stories from other Autism moms about taking all the furniture out of their children's bedrooms- in an effort to prevent self injury during a particularly difficult meltdown. Pad locking the food pantry and refridgerator because their children would constantly eat or drink.  Those who are completely non verbal or those who show no affection and dislike touch or hugs. Those who want play team sports and be included with their neuro-typical peers, only to have their feelings hurt.
Lucky.
I would hear " I don't know how you do it." And get annoyed. ( honestly I am still unhappy with that comment. We all have challenges.)
Yet, he we are. In a place I did not see coming. My very sweet, kind, loving, affectionate boy has become volatile. I knew that sometime around the teenage years, things would be difficult. Now I fear they could get worse. ( fingers crossed they don't) As I hear him giggle in the next room with Dad and his little brother I can almost forget the screaming, crying, yelling, grabbing, hitting, kicking- breaking objects- scene of the other night. But I can't. The volatile behavior has escalated all summer. The hitting has begun to take place in school, at teachers. It has escalated at home to Dad and Mom. Robbie is struggling. We are struggling.
Many friends have asked if something changed? What do I think the cause is? Like the Autism logo, a puzzle piece, I think there are many things that play a part in the internal struggle Robbie is dealing with.
1)Too much sugar and junk food. This is always a struggle in our house as he won't stop at 1 soda- he sneaks 3 or 4. He can't take a small bowel of Doritos , he'll eat the entire bag.
2) Timmy- who is a toddler and gets a lot of attention. Lexi- who is a 7 year old girl and speaks very quickly and very often.
3) Change in routine/ environment. While he is going to the same school, with the same teacher, we are told this year is more challenging. There are a few new students as some have moved on.
4) I think- Robbie is also struggling with his communication limitations. Life is fast and loud. While he may not be holding his ears, noise bothers him. At dinner time he struggles to keep up with conversation. Although we try to slow things down and keep the noise level to a minimum , it's hard to do. Robbie also hears and understands everything. He knows he has autism and that his siblings do not. He know he is different.
What do we do now? Rob created a social story about not hitting, kicking, etc.  We are moving things around in his room to give him a safer place to let out his frustrations. We are locking cabinets and limiting junk in the house. We are trying to slow down and be a bit more quiet. We are continuing to tell Robbie how much we love him and give him bear hugs. We are doing the best we can, just as Robbie is.
And 2 days later as I've let this post sit to reflect before posting, I've heard "I'm sorry Mom" more times than I can count and seemingly out of the blue.  My reply is " I know Robbie, and I'm sorry too."